Americans Against Self-Help Fraud!
Your partner in developing critical thinking skills!
Lyrics by Dick Dangerous & The Luggnutts
This is scientifically-proven to be much, much harder than the rock you're doing right now: don't mix them. This is a highly-diluted substance guaranteed to transform you with it's very high potency. It's organic, it's all natural and promises to be delivered packed with energy. My guide says you can self-actualize on this: It's free range.
Baby: you be knowing that you can't do too little but did you be knowing that you can't do too much? It cures cancer, AIDS, and those nagging pains that just seem to follow you around. It's got long-distance healing properties featuring naturopathic medicinal treatments revealed to a Tibetan Buddist while he was yogic flying over a Whole Foods. He was last identified as a UFO, located laughing, right near the Kundalini state.
Yes, that's gotta be a third world country: someplace like California or France. I'm out to prove Big Pharma sure don't want y'all to know about this one. It's been located right under your nose but you couldn't smell for the incense. Or is that sage? I don't know: maybe that's The Secret!
[Chorus]
But the Beastie Boys were there.
Oprah Winfrey was there.
All the psychics were there.
Where the hell were you?
Dr. Phil say: This is homeopathic, chiropractic, acupuncture made Eastern ancient art. Now how you feel about that? Will you work with me? We're utilizing herbs and spices combined with quantum physics creating energy substances to keep you from aging. I hate you but, I mean, just look at me: I know Bono!
What the bleep does the Crack know? The Crack Emcee knows a lot: the earth's getting hot. You wanna go green? Come party with me - [I'll change you like the climate.] Ladies, my precious bodily fluids, of course, have got that vital force. I'm a Indigo Child. Born to be wild, All the knowledge of Joseph Smith and the Dali Lama, Tom Cruise, Adolf Hitler, and Genghis Khan - and all from one tiny little pill. We call it litoris. Rub it, or this CD, or any .mp3 with me against any part that hurts. Don't sweat it: your stress is a thing of the past: it sure can't last, now...
Meditate. Meditate. Meditate - hold that pose. Yea, I be liking it when you do that Downward Dog thing
Dick Dangerous & The Luggnutts are a group that promotes peace.
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Americans Against Self-Help Fraud Mission!
AASF works to educate the public about ethical, honest & valid practices in the self-help field through information, education & research.
AASF focuses on ethical practices & professional standards & does not conduct investigations or report unethical practices or people who violate the law!
2011 SCAMMY AWARD WINNERS!
AASF is pleased to announce the “winners” of the Scammy Awards given to Self Help Gurus for their "excellence" in ripping off Americans with falsehoods, false hopes, myths & half-truths!
The intention of the awards is to ensure Self Help Gurus receive the attention they deserve. The general public picked the winners through an online survey and this year’s response shows that Americans do care about the negative impact that the highly profitable “Self Help-Industrial Complex" is having on America.
The results of this year’s awards are particularly timely in light of the increased number of desperate Americans being victimized by these gurus.
Awards are determined by the highest number of total votes and, in some cases, when the totals are close, a runner-up is also selected. The winners are as follows:
DUMB SPEAK AWARD given for the most unintelligent thing uttered by a Self-Help Guru goes to James Ray & runner-up Vianna Stibal
HYPOCRITE AWARD given to the Self-Help guru with the biggest gap between their professed values and how they actually behave goes to James Ray
DADDY BIG BUCKS AWARD given to the Self-Help Guru whose lifestyle shows that they are only in it for the money goes to James Ray & runner-up Jack Canfield & Tony Robbins (tie)
HOODWINKED AWARD given to the Self-Help Guru who did the best job of tricking celebrities into being their sponsor goes to James Ray & runner-up Vianna Stibal
CHARLIE SHEEN BI-POLAR AWARD given to the Self-Help Guru whose promises got the opposite results goes to James Ray
BEST PERFORMANCE IN A MIS-LEADING ROLE AWARD given to the Self Help Guru who did the best job of deceiving the public goes to James Ray & runner-up Vianna Stibal
BERNIE MADOFF LIFETIME MIS-ACHIEVEMENT AWARD given to the best, all around Self-Help Guru who did the most to diminish the human race goes to James Ray
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Featured Self-Help Resource by Dr. John Norcross
A Critical Analysis of "The Secret" as a cult!
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